Tag Archives: holidays

The Release

 

I’m gonna write.

Because I woke up in the middle of night, wearing skinny jeans. And I thought to myself, that life is good.

But damn, I don’t deserve it.

During my absence, a lot of things have happened. Happened too fast, happened all together. It was hard to write, because I felt like I lost myself. I was everywhere and nowhere. Although it seems like a lame attempt to justify my lack of effort on this blog, it’s been really difficult to write. It’s been a really difficult time.

But now, I’m free. And it’s a good night to release these lingering thoughts.

***

University is the worst roller coaster ride. Damn. I came in this school year with prime optimism and for the life of me, I do not know where it’s gone in the the middle of it all. My academic pursuit for the semester has been awry. More like average. And I hate it with every ounce of my braincells. Average is not my potential, and I refuse to be ‘just’ okay. I want to excel, and I want it so bad. Or at least, that’s what I tell myself.

I learned that I can write, but I can’t write great. And that hurts me for some reason. Not because I thought I was great, but because I’m struggling. I’m actually learning how to write, like a baby learning how to talk. It’s funny because I thought I was somehow beyond adequate. Damn.

Amidst the slight academic turmoil, I’m thankful that I survived. I mean, it might not be much but making it through the first semester with some sense of sanity left must count for something. I like that I didn’t give up when I thought it’s near hopeless. Being able to push when things are rough makes me feel a little better about myself. I just hope, I come through next semester.

***

I miss my family a lot. Especially, this holiday season. It’s a family affair after all. Although being away from them made me grow in some ways, I can’t wait until I can live under the same roof with them again.

Christmas is always tough being at a distance from your loved ones, but it sure does help when they send you to a holiday trip. But then again, it’s all about family at this time of year so it’s hard not to be a bit glum.

I’m happy though, that I’m able to spend the holidays going about Las Vegas and California. The amount of fun I’ve had so far is ridiculous. Not to mention, the New year’s eve I’ll be spending at Disneyland!

***

I’m beyond blessed. And I don’t deserve it.

But I’ll write about it.

Every single time.

🙂

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A Sunny Evaluation Pt. 2

Summer flew by quickly as if it were a bright yellow flash. Maybe it’s because of the constant glare of the sun. But it’s been alright I guess. After all, time doesn’t idly by. It wont wait for you to finish your coffee, more so give you time make conversations. So it’s all wise to make the moments count.

Recap, rundown, round up. Here goes..

  • Money magic trick. This is a one of those acts that non-magicians can pull off with their own wallets. It’s not uncommon at all. See something nice, *POOF*. Money gone, pulls out item from a bag. Cue the tossing of loose change.. Please.
  • New admission. I’ve started joining a legit Bible Study at this course of my stay. And I must say, these studies are quite intense. Intentional to the point that I feel like the Gospel singles me out. Nonetheless, it’s all heavenly vibes.
  • X-Box Live. Serious gaming mode: Finally signed up for a Live account and got Battlefield 3. Been a daytime zombie ever since. Not to mention, a major anger management candidate.
  • Losing streak. I’ve managed a mean tally of losses the past few ball games. Frustrating. But this is not an update about how I’m struggling at basketball. It’s just that I’m learning how to get out of some heavy funk. Slowly, steadily.
  • “At the top”. Finally reach the pinnacle viewing spot of Burj Khalifa- The tallest tower on Earth! Definitely a noteworthy experience considering the fact that I’m a complete acrophobic. Well, ‘was’ an acrophobic. Win. Shout out to the Kuwaiti-bunch for sharing the experience!
  • Death by drowning. Damn. I almost died swimming. Made me think about life and all the crap I’ve been doing. Thank you, God for saving me. But next time ward me of the deep end. Thanks.
  • ‘The Friendzone Purgatory’. There should be a post dedicated to my friend who is not my friend right now but still is.
  • Bum. I swear, I regret letting a whole set of days go by without any happenings. Total bummer.
  • Drunk text. So I finally hang out with my ‘other’ friends. Those who choose not to go to church. And that night I sent an SMS to my dad’s old company number, my folks asked me if I got sloshed. Laughed so hard.
  • Countdown. The day that looms ahead. Damn. I will have to count soon. But for now we bask under the sun.

As I’ve mentioned, the day of my departure is to come soon. But I don’t want to burden myself with anxiety for time will come for me anyway. So as long I have my feet on the sand I’ll keep my chin up. And march on wards.

I hope you, reader is having a pleasant summer!

A Sunny Evaluation Pt. 1

SONGOFTHEMOMENT: Cry When You Get Older by Robyn

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Homebound

Almost seven months of being deprived of family. Finally, I’m a sleep away from home.

Peg City, you’ve been good to me. You held off your frozen tempers at the height of winter and you blew spring breeze unto me. Your folks have been nothing short of friendly, true to their Manitoba colors. And for that, I say “thank you”.

Honestly, I’ve had quite an experience upon staying at theses ends for some time. I learned how to be independent (somehow). I was taught how to mow the lawn, shovel snow and other important lie skills needed for the road to success. Lol. But seriously, I got sloshed, blew out my money, lied and cheated. I lost myself. But only to know myself better. My stay at this humble city wasn’t a walk in the park. The road was bumpy and harsh. But I tread on for this moment.

Almost there.

Thank you Winnipeg and Winnipeg-ers.

See you until fall! Have an immense summer. Aye!

SONGOFTHEMOMENT: Wheel by John Mayer

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The Itchy Feeling Of University

I wish I was writing about how winter term was done and dealt with already. Unfortunately, it’s still hanging around for 2 more weeks.

Uff.

I can’t wait to blog about pure summer optimism; everything sunny and bright that shimmers at night. But no, the goddam universe decides to slow its course on me. Well, then, fine. I’m gonna start scratching this bloody blogging itch already.

:-p

Castles will make anything look appropriately academic.

My stay here at Peg city has been quite a story so far. Being away from la familia and all; trying to stand independent and discovering what makes me what I am. Dozens of lessons have come my way every since. Especially going to university. Walking the hallways as an invisible freshman is daunting in a way that your status is a complete mystery to people. Nonetheless, university has been quite the experience.

So here’s a couple of things I’ve wade through in my first university take:

  • Strangers are strange. Sitting in a massive sociology class with a myriad of anonymous students is awkward. Being the timid person that I am, I didn’t know how to exactly interact with my fellow classmates. The fact that everyone seem so zoned in on the lesson made me think that I was in a class full of robotic intellectuals who don’t care about any social interaction. It was only at the end that the class managed to step out of the tin can shells and socialize with each other.
  • Friendliness is the cure to friendlessness. As I’ve written before, walking the hallways by my lonesome self and sitting in class with little old me can be quite lonely. But sometimes, it just takes a smile and a fake question to initiate a conversation which could lead to decent degree of acquaintance.
  • Canteen food is utter bull. Man, I will never know why I bought chicken strips for 10 dollars! Microwaved meals are magic! If only I found out about it a tad bit sooner. I wouldn’t have wasted good cash on them lousy potatoes!
  • The library is the G-spot. I have zero ghetto cred to know the definition but the library is my favorite place in the whole campus. Being around a thousand  books and people who give no single care about what happens outside is somehow sort of serene. There’s no better place to study.
  • Coffee conviction. I don’t know if caffeine is cosmically bonded to post secondary education and beyond because I’m hooked. I was never the coffee guy. I thought coffee was plain overrated. But a hot sip of caffeinated goodness is like fuel to my engines.
  • University kids love riots. I don’t know for certain if rioting is a Canadian thing but I found that the university is great plateau for young activists who has hot blood to stand against government and stuff. I have yet to join in on a rally for something politically significant but I figure it’s going to be very mean and angry.
  • I actually learn stuff. Okay, I don’t know what happened in high school but I seem to absorb every detail they teach us at university. Also, I feel a slight more significance about the matter taught in university whereas high school lessons just seem to breeze through my my mind. It’s weird

There’s a lot more silly conundrums that I’ve encountered in my first wave of university endeavor. But it’s been fun so far. Not just academically but all around life as well. It’s an entirely new experience with a countless lessons to be learned. And I’m loving it..

I really am.

🙂

I just wish it’d finish already.

SONGOFTHEMOMENT: Strawberry Swing by Frank Ocean

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