Category Archives: Gospel

“No Sleep for the Non-Roman”

I lay awake at night, sometimes. Thinking to myself, questions and answers about life and the world I live in; the people that I encounter; time and moments instilled in my memory. I’d like to think I’m profound, but maybe I’m distressed..

Yes. No.

I don’t know.

Certainly, there other things to live for, other aspects of this vast universe worthy of thought. But I’m utterly stumped with this idea that my tiny existence in this massive Earth will cause me to live a life unfulfilled. Unfulfilled because this grand world is too big for my most humble entity to consume. Yet, it’s so easy for reality to eat me up alive.

I believe in God, Jesus. And from what He says, I am not a part of this world. Therefore I should not succumb myself to this land, but to the heavens above. Cliche as it seems, this is a daunting task. To live in Rome but not as a Roman. How can a man live his life and act dead to it?

I’m haunted by this thought that the same immense God is shrinking the world I breathe in. And, I’m in the midst of suffocating like, He doesn’t want me to inhale the air of this abyss until I find myself out of breath, dead. Dead to this world. Is this why he created my essence so miniature compared to the size of this world? Just to show me that I am not capable of experiencing the entirety of this human realm; that I will be quickly exhausted before I even come close to tasting a hint of this Earth?

Damn.

I wait for the night that I will finally sleep at ease and these thoughts will be alas, laid to rest. Because, my mind is tired and my heart is heavy. This double-standard life is thoroughly depleting.

SONGOFTHEMOMENT: Covet by Beautiful Eulogy

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A Sunny Evaluation Pt.1

It’s been a good month of vacationing. Hanging out, eating, loitering, not writing.. It’s all swell and good. But not really the optimum productivity level I was hoping for. It’s that goddam ‘Summer Paradox’ I tell you!

Although my first month has been a good time to catch up with my folks, I wasn’t really able to keep a lay-low after telling a handful of people about my arrival. I could just imagined if I announced it. But just to give you a early overview of my holidays. Here’s what’s been up:

  • La Familia is the same and will always stay the same. It was as if it was just yesterday when me and my folks picked up our last conversation. And if you think we’ve grown apart, you’d be damn wrong. Talking to these guys is like a discourse of sheer clarity.
  • Good eats! From home cooked meals to fancy joints. Not to mention a bucket of KFC. I’ve enjoyed loads of fine flavored foods this past month. And yes, I am eating rice on a daily basis.
  • No workout. Fat.
  • Dusty dribbles. They have a good bunch of ballers down at them sandy asphalt courts. Boys who’ve got a winning pedigree in their varsity background. I smell blood and competition. I’m so rusty though! Have to step my game up.
  • Spiritual comeback. My climb to the feet of the cross is nearing to its destination. I’ve had much clarity thanks to the people used by God as instruments. Almost there.
  • Money matters. I feel like I’ve shopped like a posh blonde for the lack of a better simile.
  • “Lettuce Ketchup”. I’ve had sometime to catch up with a few close people. And I have to say that I’m very much thankful that these people stayed the same in regards to our friendship. Quick to advise and alert to listen. If there is depth over distance, this should be it.
  • Schoolboy troubles. Thanks to my folks utter nagging to determine my academic pursuits. I’ve had much progress on choosing what major to take and what subjects to sign up for.
  • Tongue-tied Tagalog. Tagalog is the Filipino dialect. One that I’ve grown apart from and is currently re-learning. Not to mention sucking.

The list isn’t as elaborate. Coupled by a lacking on post entries, this is not a detailed summer rundown. I have to admit that I’ve been duped by that sunny phantom named ‘procrastination’. And so, I spent my days not writing.

But like a train that runs on steam. I’ve been thinking. And I’ll be soon to let out the smoke.

PS. I will have to print the lists I’ve written down prior my vacation. I’m gonna have to staple it on my forehead.

SONGOFTHEMOMENT: I’ll Be Alright by Passion Pit

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‘Who I Am’..

I am a flower quickly fading, here today and gone tomorrow. A wave tossed in the ocean, a vapor in the wind. Still, you hear me when I’m calling…

‘Who I Am‘, Casting Crowns

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Oxymoron

For a liar to go to church is to be utmost true to oneself.

 

SONGTHEMOMENT: Lord Of Patience by Shai Linne feat. Melissa T.

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4-20: A Different Kind Of High

Apparently, it’s 4-20 today.

“Burn time”

I was appalled by the fact that such event existed and is celebrated. I have nothing against weed or whatever it is that someone may find pleasurable. As long as you don’t interfere with other people’s business; staying perfectly behaved and conscious, it’s okay. Puff smoke like a chimney.

Now that I’ve introduced the topic of discussion. Here’s my two cents about the matter. Note that I have never taken a hit before and not planning to anytime soon. The statements below depict the typical action and reaction of users (first quotation) as well as innocent beneficiaries (second quotation).

  • Do you want to take a hit?“. “No, thank you”. I’ll pass“. This is the ‘sharing‘ stage; the deal usually starts in this scenario. And most often than not it’s just blind generosity; people don’t want you to be a godforsaken drug addict, they’re just obliviously considerate. They want you to experience the high-delight.  Trouble is when you decline.
  • Come on man. Try it”. “No it’s alright. I’m good. Thanks for sharing..” This is the “persistence” stage which comes in three waves. The first wave is very subtle; a slight urge to double-check on double-takers. If the user is sensible, the offer would be declined.
  • Just one hit, man. Don’t be a buzzkill”. “…”. The second wave is the part where stubborn meets stoned. And this is usually when when the beneficiary is put on the spot for refusing; it gets ugly at this phase. And depending on the degree of high and current mood of the user, an argument can arise. Consequently, people tend to give in at this point.
  • Why not?”. *Explains* This is the confrontation stage; the part where a rebuttal is conceived. To ask me the first time is completely fine. But when I have to reiterate several times to try and convince you that I’m just not into that sort of stuff, I get really ticked off. Most of the time, one’s counter will baffle the user leading into repetitive interrogation.
  • “Life is short. Do it for the experience. It wont hurt. It’s not addictive”. “…”. This is the third wave of the ‘persistence‘ stage; a cliche dialogue to try and lure you to temptation. Life is certainly short, and shorter if you get screwed on that junk. Neither, does it make you live longer. There’s loads of other experiences more worthwhile than that stuff. If you really want to experience life, try skydiving or something. Sure it doesn’t hurt, you may even say it’s improves health. But if you’re taking a drug supposedly for the ill, that just makes you sick. I don’t believe it’s not addictive because if it wasn’t, you wouldn’t bother smoking it.

Weed is just not my thing. And that should be a perfectly viable excuse. No further doubts whatsoever.

I get dismayed when people automatically start to clash weed and Christianity together. Like the reason I don’t do it is because of sheer abstinence due to my faith. Yes, I abstain from such things; not just because it’s bad. But also because I believe in a potent form of happiness. Not something I steam out of my mouth and nostrils. I am better than that. People are better than that.

Your high don’t last forever.

SONGOFTHEMOMENT: Youth by Daughter

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What I Got From A Kinder Egg

Honestly, I never knew it was Holy Week until after I got pulled out from my 15 dollar Good Friday shift at the pizza place.

How dumb of a Christian am I?

The single most important time in the entire universe. And I had not a hot clue. I’m not so much disappointed at the fact that I forgot but more so on the reason that I was unaware because of my unfamiliar environment. I was taken out from my spiritual comfort zone and was put in a generic spot where there was no one to remind me.

I am ashamed.

I stand frustrated. Frustrated with my Christian life and the world, with all it has to offer. Indeed my faith is put into the challenge when the world gives me life that’s tangible whereas my God gives life that is spiritual.

It’s a good thing I managed to hit the church today. And to be reminded of his acts that he had done on the cross, it’s beautiful. The blood shed from the thorns on his head and the pain he endured to save a wretch like me. For him to stoop so low as to walk on the dirt I swim in. My God.

He died from the sting of death that was set for me..

I am ashamed..

Because on this day that I ate merrily and gobbled giant Kinder eggs for dessert; the life of The Most High was nailed on the cross. And I lived another day of my life whereas He lost His for mine.

I cannot repay the debt he paid. I can never.

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Pretty Little Liar

Sometimes we learn what we’re not taught.

That’s the thought that would underline the gist of my talk tonight. Where in the world do kids learn how to lie deliberately? No mum in the right mind would ever mistake to teach her kids things immoral.

My little nephew about  the age of 6, came to my room in dire need of help with his homework. I say ‘dire’ because he was itching to kill countless minutes of his precious childhood playing Dragonvale. (Admittedly, I squander valuable time in that game too. :p) I told him to get started while I went about my business for some time. Upon getting back, he sprung up with his hands ready to nab the iPad; he claimed to have finished reading his book and obliged me to sign the paper as formality. I was in no doubt. Until..

Me: What’s the title of the book again? I need to write it on the paper.

Nephew: It’s there! *points at the book*

Me: I know it’s there, what’s the title? ( gets strongly suspicious)

Nephew: I forgot.

Me: *doubtful stare-down*

Nephew: Aaa–uu-nunu-tt…

Me: Aunt Jessie.

Nephew: *smiles cheekily*

Now whether he told his folks about it as I instructed him to, is not important. But the thing that baffles me the most is how in such fresh age of mind did he acquire the knowledge to lie. As much as I don’t want to brush off the topic of biological determinism for the sake of sociological irritation. It seems to me that our innate sinfulness is ripe right from the start of our existence.

I’m not going to front. I’ve mastered the art of deceit to a certain degree that I’m capable of smoothly winging through and around concrete truth. Everyone does. But it would be nonsensical for mature individuals to condone such practices. And we don’t usually pass our untruthful habits off. Children will find their access to dishonesty regardless. Now there could be countless sociological reasons as to why. But I’m going to leave it as such.

It’s just mental to witness the early roots of our disgrace evident  even in a childhood frame.

We’re born bad, but to be bad is a choice, and to be saved is grace.

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“On Any Given Sunday”

I don’t know what’s the the weekend agenda up in heaven but it seems like The Guy upstairs and hordes of celestial beings paused their divine activities just to tear open the skies and shine their light on the spiritually controversial, Tim Tebow spear heading the ultimate dark horse team, Denver Broncos.

I sat on the couch with no expectation whatsoever on what this unlikely team would decide to pull out from it’s relatively short sleeve of game tactics. And this is what I love about watching teams that are considered the underdogs:  You can watch their game without little or no investment of confidence and support which not only saves you from pointless frustration when they lose. But also, make you drop your jaws when they win.

There’s three things you ought to know about this game:

  1. Ben Roethlisberger was injured. This is one of the most renowned quarterbacks that have played the game. And there’s no doubt to his experience, not mention his toughness on playing hurt. So he still plays a major part in setting the stakes of this game.
  2. The Pittsburgh Steelers have one of the most solid defensive schemes in the whole league. Built brick by brick of  sheer brawn and power. These men basically comprises into stone cold walls; a wall that comes at you.
  3. The Broncos had Tim Tebow. (and an army of invisible transcendental angels)

This really wasn’t a game. This was a dead giveaway claimed by many critics.

And in a world where everybody has their own day. This one was for the skeptics and not for Tim Tebow and The Broncos. Tim Tebow had a superb passing game which not only surprising but also impressive. He wasn’t a very good passer to be honest and for him to do so was far by a longshot. And long shot it was.

I’m no gonna question the religious aspects behind the miraculous plays by Tim Tebow but I would like to give my respect to this young believer right here who glorifies Christ with his gifted talents.

A classic sport fairytale.

SONGOFTHEMOMENT: The Sunny Side Of Hell by Grieves

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Because Sometimes The Truth Hurts

Yo.

I’m sinful right through the marrow of my bones; my mind is a vessel of corruption; eyes that seek only flesh and mouth that spews filth. And a soul that is battered to numbness lies within.

Yet Christ chose to die for me..

Although He knew fully well that repentance will not be my first choice.. Still He died.

Sometimes The Gospel baffles me to a point of sheer frustration. It is just so difficult to question his profound love for a sinner. Not just for a one time, short period of a sinner. But one that is ironically consistent..

I’m stuck in a barren wasteland where I have no water but not at all thirsty; have nothing to eat but not famished. No, I live for other pleasures that incompletely satisfies. Aimless agendas that render happiness but not joy.

My mind perceives all the right ways but my heart does not allow any blood to flow through my veins to initiate any form of action. There seems to be a divorce between my heart and mind; tearing up my soul.

The heart of Christ was crushed for mine.

I should know better than to try and test His holiness. Foolish, as I am. I let him wait until my own pleasing because He is patient. I hope I learn soon enough. Because grace only lasts a lifetime..

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Look Ma..

jesus_of_nazareth_by_lueb_art-d3jxckg

Hugh Laurie anyone? :p

So I was watching my nephew’s school play for Christmas last night and I happened to be seated next to this big ball of charm, boxed in a miniature frame, laced with pure innocence; a little girl. And she said,

.. Look, mom.

(Bearded man walks onto the stage with a woman expectant of a child)

(She points at the man with the glorious, most artificial beard)

… Is that Jesus???

We all laughed.

It was cute. Until my grandma took a wise crack to it.

…. Look, it’s Saint Peter.

Good grieving graciousness. *slaps forehead*

I know no one has seen Jesus and I know no one who wants to, yet. But we can never recreate the image of Christ. Frankly, I’m not certainly sure where people got the absurd notion that God had the fairest skin, a hippy crown of hair and a renowned trademark beard.

For he grew up before him like a young plant, and like a root out from dry ground; he had no form or majesty that we should look at him and no beauty that we should desire him. -Isaiah 53:2

I have a silly theory that Jesus meant for us not to see any of his facial features. And the reason is profoundly cliche –He wants us to believe by faith and not by sight.

It’s not about what He looks like but what He did to atone for our shameful sins.

And the rugged mystery item is.. Joseph.

😐

Happy almost Christmas. 🙂

P.S. I’m Christian. Yo.

SONGOFTHEMOMENT: The Perfection Of Beauty by Shai Linne featuring Blair Linne

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